PeevePile • A Pet Peeve Archive

Any rendition of "Silver Bells" in 4/4 time.
Also: The gospely "soulful" repetition of the title line three times per chorus in "Santa Claus is Comin' To Town."

— Tedman from Illinois | Music | 12.26.2010 | Comments (1)

Constantly offering to or insisting that the elderly sit down.
I know it's out of respect, but this one would probably grind my gears if I was an old fart. I think I would parse it as "Stay where I can see ya and don't go breaking hips."

— Tedman from IL | Conversation | 11.15.2010 | Comments (1)

Describing the gastric effects of a food suggested.
Spare me. I don't want to hear "All this cheese is gonna bind me right up!" over the clinking of silverware. Or, "Whoo, this is gonna be just as hot going out as it is coming in!" I'm not a manners snob, but can I at least ask that you spare me this? Stop having the Pavlovian response of a loud Bronx Cheer to the word "beans."

— Tedman from IL | Etiquette | 9.24.2010 | Comments (0)

New co-workers asking if I like my new job.
People only ask this to make conversation with the new guy. Real answer: "It's retail. I'd rather be neutering myself with a wooden spoon, but it beats dying broke." That takes too long to say and might garner some strange looks, so I just say the answer that will shut them up the fastest: "yeah, it's not bad."

— Tedman from IL | Work | 4.6.2010 | Comments (0)

People who touch computer screens.
Unless it's a touch screen, this is totally unnecessary. Point at what you're talking about and leave your greasy thumbs fingers for the remote control.

— Tedman from Mt. Vernon, Illinois | Technology | 2.2.2010 | Comments (5)

Saying that men watching their own kids are "babysitting." » 5 stars

Water on the counter at a public bathroom such that when you lean over to wash your hands, your stomach and crotch area get all wet. » 5 stars

When people tell me to "calm down" when I am already calm. » 5 stars

Putting on a clean pair of socks, entering the bathroom or kitchen and standing in a water splash left on the floor, thus getting your clean socks wet and forcing you to change them. » 5 stars

Excessive and difficult-to-remove packaging » 4.95238 stars

Rolls of toilet paper in which the size and weight to tensile strength ratio renders it impossible to dispense the paper in the usual manner (ie: pull on the end, roll turns, paper advances). » 4.93333 stars

Doctors "shortening" your wait time by making you wait in the exam room instead. » 4.93333 stars

People who touch computer screens. » 4.91667 stars

Using mobile phones at the register. » 127 Comments

The non-existance of unpadded bras in cup sizes less than D. Macy's, Victoria's secret, and Bloomingdales do not carry them. unpadded. » 41 Comments

People who put ketchup in the refrigerator. » 41 Comments

When pregnant women complain about being pregnant. » 39 Comments

People who deliberately pronounce words incorrectly and repeatedly. » 34 Comments

Women who are just so beautiful they don't have to contribute to sex... » 32 Comments

"Irregardless." » 30 Comments

Saying that men watching their own kids are "babysitting." » 27 Comments

Using mobile phones at the register. » super – Peenevoni 2/6

Using mobile phones at the register. » super – ignolefolla 2/6

Using mobile phones at the register. » super – shoopsync 2/5

Using mobile phones at the register. » super – Tixexteve 2/5

10.31.10

Thanks to a recent torrent of spam, I’ve had to disable comments for a while. I’ve now removed the ability to put links in the comments. Email me if you want to put something in, such as five links to knock-off handbag sites, and I’ll happily oblige.

09.10.10

I’ve added two features to the sidebar: Highest Rating and Hotly Debated. They will be updated daily. To my surprise, the ketchup-in-fridge peeve seemed to really incite some anger — it’s clearly a complex situation that affects us all.

It should be noted that the star ratings indicate how much you agree with, or appreciate, the peeve, not how you feel when it happens.

I will be adding a Paragon Peeves section as well, for my and my friends’ personal favorites.

Please enjoy, and contact me if you have any new feature ideas.