PeevePile • A Pet Peeve Archive » Fear of gender assignment: using a plural general pronoun to refer to a singular specific person.

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Fear of gender assignment: using a plural general pronoun to refer to a singular specific person.

"I don't like that person because they always leave the toilet seat up." Dude. "They" is a "he"!

— Jill from QuakerBubble, PA | Language | 7.26.2009 | Comments (6)

In cases where it could be a 'he' or 'she' I prefer 'they'. I don't like gender specificity, but I understand how this case would be aggravating for grammarians.

— Biffy

I once sang in a choir at a very liberal New York, East Village church where they didn't like to assign a gender to God (which I have no problem with, really). I did have a problem when they did the same thing with Jesus. I'm not all "Christian McChristian" but I think it's okay and PC to refer to Jesus as a man since, um, he was one.

— erika

Doing that is understandable when you have no idea of what gender the person is. But in that case I see how it can be aggravating.

— Meneh

This one is worse than fingernails on a blackboard! How much courage does it take to use the gender neutral "he" when the gender is unknown? In the romance languages the plural pronouns are all masculine unless the group is made up entirely of females; however, that's not what makes Italians male chauvinists!

— Parma John

The problem is that "they" is not a singular pronoun. So, while it is general and avoids using gender, when you use it, you are always referring to more than one person, whether you intend it or not. Maybe "he or she" could work? Or just twist the gender stereotype around and default to "she"? "They" and "their" are fine if you're talking about a group. But if you're talking about one person, deal with the fact that you're talking about one person.

— JS posted 7/26/2009

Read this weekend's William Safire in the NY Times. They was traditionally used in these cases for some time. As for it being plural, "you" began as a plural pronoun and was turned to singular and I hear no one objecting to that. As for the "courage" it takes to reinforce age-old Europeon sexism, surely you jest. Just because you don't find it offensive doesn't mean that it isn't sexist.

— Mike posted 7/27/2009

Putting on a clean pair of socks, entering the bathroom or kitchen and standing in a water splash left on the floor, thus getting your clean socks wet and forcing you to change them. » 5 stars

Excessive and difficult-to-remove packaging » 4.95455 stars

Having to act completely surprised and utterly amazed by any and all gifts given to you in a public setting. » 4.90909 stars

When two light switches control the same light, but one must be off and the other on for the light switch to work. » 4.90909 stars

Driving behind someone with their blinker on for miles. » 4.90909 stars

Being forced to participate in a bouquet/garter toss at a wedding » 4.9 stars

Saying that men watching their own kids are "babysitting." » 4.88235 stars

The dried lotion booger stuck on the nozzle of the lotion bottle. » 4.88235 stars

Using mobile phones at the register. » 127 Comments

When pregnant women complain about being pregnant. » 47 Comments

The non-existance of unpadded bras in cup sizes less than D. Macy's, Victoria's secret, and Bloomingdales do not carry them. unpadded. » 46 Comments

People who put ketchup in the refrigerator. » 44 Comments

People who deliberately pronounce words incorrectly and repeatedly. » 34 Comments

"Irregardless." » 32 Comments

Women who are just so beautiful they don't have to contribute to sex... » 32 Comments

Saying that men watching their own kids are "babysitting." » 27 Comments

The non-existance of unpadded bras in cup sizes less than D. Macy's, Victoria's secret, and Bloomingdales do not carry them. unpadded. » I'm a 36DD. I do need thin padding so no1 loses an eye on cool days & that hasn't been hard to find. What I am having zero success with is a bra my size that offers some semi-thick padding beneath my breasts. I know that the purpose of this padding is to offer girls with a smaller cup sz some added lift, but with DDs I need lift too, just for a different reason. I don't want the "girls" smacking my chin, but I don't want them slapping my knees either. – drinna28 5/15

Touching a pregnant woman's belly without being A) the father, or B) her OB-GYN. » When i was pregnant, my hubby allows me and i also agree with it try it u will hve fun – Atiqa 5/14

When deli sandwiches or bagels with cream cheese are cut in half but the cut does not go all the way through, so you have to tear it in half anyway. The balance and structure of the sandwich are needlessly compromised. » hi there stevo this is the web address info ,give them a call ,tell them gazza recommened you – garydetlon 5/11

Can I Ask You a Question? » Common persons do not have appropriate essays writing abilities. – CraneDora 5/10

10.31.10

Thanks to a recent torrent of spam, I’ve had to disable comments for a while. I’ve now removed the ability to put links in the comments. Email me if you want to put something in, such as five links to knock-off handbag sites, and I’ll happily oblige.

09.10.10

I’ve added two features to the sidebar: Highest Rating and Hotly Debated. They will be updated daily. To my surprise, the ketchup-in-fridge peeve seemed to really incite some anger — it’s clearly a complex situation that affects us all.

It should be noted that the star ratings indicate how much you agree with, or appreciate, the peeve, not how you feel when it happens.

I will be adding a Paragon Peeves section as well, for my and my friends’ personal favorites.

Please enjoy, and contact me if you have any new feature ideas.