PeevePile • A Pet Peeve Archive » "I'm bad at names."

"I'm bad at names."

No, you're not. No one is bad at names. Names are not the violin. Names are not something you can be bad at. What you are is lazy and uninterested in making the fractional effort required to remember someone's name, before glossing over this laziness with the self-satisfied excuse of "call me the absent-minded professor!"

— Goome from New York City | Conversation | 5.21.2009 | Comments (13)

Not everyone who forgets someone else's name is lazy. Some people do have bad memory (myself included).

— JackGeneric

I agree it's obnoxious to say "I'm bad at names." It's not really admitting a weakness, is it? It's just saying, "Hi, nice to meet you -- don't expect me to remember your name!" Which is basically understood anway, so it's just condescending to say it. However: who does remember names, unless you really think the person is cute?

— Edwin

i have a really hard time remembering people's names. i try, i'll ask them their name again and repeat it just to make sure i got it, but five minutes later it will have escaped me. i'm really bad at memorizing in general, and that's one of those kinds of things, so i'd understand if someone said that to begin with. it's more like, "please don't be offended if i can't remember your name"

— Anonymous

I can see a person every week when they're picking up their paycheck and have to ask them their name each time. I'm bad at names. I'm not lazy. I just can't remember.

— Krista

maybe people have bad memories and they want you to know it is likely they will forget your name

— Anonymous

I'm not bad at names. Sometimes, you missed the chance to ask the person to repeat their name, especially if it is a weird or foreign name, if you have been introduced by someone who is bad at names, and especially if you don't want to spend a lot of time clarifying someone's name if you think you'll never see them again. When that happens, I'd rather say I'm bad at remembering names than have them say "It's actually Annie, not Amy."

— Kerrin posted 5/21/2009

Yeah, I've been guilty of this. More and more I realize what a jerk I am.

— Ryuta Tanegashima posted 5/25/2009

If you're not memorable, I'm not going to remember your name.

— Sasquatch posted 5/29/2009

or maybe they have 300 people they work with + 150 classmates + professors + all of the people at the kids daycare/school (parents/kids/teachers)...no it's not a combo of all that, they are just lazy...whatever

— notlazy posted 8/2/2009

I'm absolutely terrible at remembering just about everything, names included, so I tend to start introductions with some variation of "I'm so sorry, I suck at remembering names. (name)? (name). Okay. I'm going to remember this. (name)." I put forth a genuine effort, which people seem to appreciate, and I make it clear that it's completely my fault. I haven't yet met anyone who objects.

— Epsilon posted 10/20/2009

I'm not bad at names, but I am at facial recognition. As in, I have problems picking my husband out of a crowd. (I work in a restaurant, and lets say my foray into cocktail serving was a disaster.) Therefore, I may remember your name, but if I cannot place your face I won't connect your name to it. So for all those who have problems with names, you may actually have problems with faces.

— Meg posted 12/12/2009

Wow, i guess everyone has a case of the memoritis. You remember to set your alarm, you remember to go to work, you remember what day you get paid on. Honestly, I'm good at names and i do forget acquaintances or friends of friends' names, but if you ask a in-law or possible client/customer their name? probably not so good. Take some ginko.

— Shannon posted 1/22/2010

If the person is uninteresting, boring, and I know I might not run into them again, I'll probably not remember his or her name. My brain's RAM isn't high enough since I meet so many people every day with what I do.

— John posted 2/25/2010

When parents start voicemail messages with "hey [name], it's your mother/father." » My husband does this with his kids! It never fails to drive me bugshit! – Mindy 7/26

Grubby, tangled haired children. » Keeping clean is one thing; the kids I see don't even start out clean. Parents and kids both seem to roll out of bed and go to the local WalMart (where else?) without so much as running as hairbrush through their hair or taking a bar of soap to their bodies. I think we can be quite sure they don't know what a toothbrush is for! The trend of wearing pajama bottoms in public needs to stop as well. – Mindy 7/26

When strangers try to touch my children. » Good god, it's like you read my mind. I absolutely hate it when I'm in the grocery store and people touch my son's feet or poke his little cheeks. Yes, I know he's the cutest thing on this earth but THAT DOES NOT MEAN YOU CAN TOUCH HIM – CakeThief 7/24

Air quotes. » use shocker quotes instead. form shocker with fingers, bend to mimic quoting action. – kn obel 7/22

When non-white street beggars call me racist when I don't give them money. » I always want to know if people would feel equally as badly if the opposite were true. Like, if you only gave money to non-white street beggars out of guilt/fear of being perceived as racist. That's racism, too, right? Right? No one complains about that one... – Chelsea 7/22

When non-white street beggars call me racist when I don't give them money. » Ugh. This happened to me when I declined to sign a petition without even hearing what it was about (I was also not a registered voter in that state AND was in a hurry). Jeez, I'm not racist! I hate all petition signature gatherers equally. – Kate 7/21

02.11.10

Send in your mobile phone pet peeves for the week of February 15th! Perhaps the simplest and most common generator of peeves, the mobile phone prods and pricks us in all places, public and private. With skull phones just around the corner, it’s likely these peeves will soon become irrelevant—so let’s spray them across the galaxy while we still can.

01.18.10

For the next week or so, the pictures for peeves will be of Peeve Pile’s national spokesperson, Rob Grace, and his special person, Shana, enacting various peeves. Please feel free to make such pictures yourself. Just include a link to them when submitting a peeve.

01.02.10

Hello. I’ve added a voting feature, so you can vote as you assume that you would – just click on a one-to-five star rating (it will tell you your vote has been recorded); five indicating that you completely agree with, or find the peeve amusing, one meaning the opposite.

Once a bunch of ratings are in, I’ll add a worst, and best rated area to the right column.